I went downstairs the other day to talk to mom and dad, they were already conversing about life as a subject and everything to do with it. Suddenly, something struck me and i told them my philosophy, in the easiest possible wordings . I didn't have to apply too much of myself in embellishing the wisdom because it was simple and uncluttered and it demanded a simple representation pertaining to its unadulterated existence.
Truth like wisdom demands and provides an unpretentious and unadulterated picture of the reality. The simplicity is not just its characteristic but also its undeniable and inseparable virtue.
Wisdom is what comes of age, as they say, but it simply means it comes of the experiences that man outlives.
My philosophy is simple: "You are responsible for everything that happens to you and has ever happened to you in the course of your lifetime and you took the decision for it , so why regret or blame anyone or anything external to you for it? "
Now,the philosophy is fairly simple, but if you have questions on its relevance read ahead:
Q. I never wanted to do it, i was forced or compelled by circumstances
Ans. Firstly, you wanted to do it, which is why you did it, it is your decision, so why regret it? Secondly,circumstances are also an outcome of your previous decisions that your mind has been taking over the period of time,consciously or unconsciously [ By unconsciously i certainly do not mean that you were unaware of the decisions being taken, i simply suggest that you wanted to be ignorant towards the decisions being made by your mind ]. So everything you do determines your circumstance and everything you do and chose to be ignorant towards becomes an object of your accusation.
Q. I cannot ignore my family and friends while deciding,moreover they take all my decisions.
Ans. Again, it is your personal decision to be influenced by your peers or family and this is again a decision that you take.Your friends or family take your decision only when you 'decide' that they must be empowered to take your decisions.
Q. Why I cant make good decisions?
Ans. Of course you make good decisions, even the decision to order your food or what to wear to office is a decision and everyone makes their own decisions. What you decide is what your mind weighs as the best possible decision given the circumstance and you consciously take the decision, so why even for a second repent? You should take pride in whatever decisions you have taken and never feel sorry for them. So Never regret and shoulder responsibility for it !
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I don't agree with this.. There is what is known as a circle of influence (coi). the meaning of which is self-evident.
ReplyDeleteAccording to me, you can only change the course of things that are in your circle of influence. For eg, you can decide what to wear to work.
But you cannot reduce the possibility of a crow shitting on your brand new shirt when you walk out..In which case, i am perfectly entitled to complain. You may justify your point by saying that I am responsible for walking on the path the crow chose to shit on, but I don't agree with that :D
So, there are countless things on which you ALONE don't have any control (there are many other independent actors involved) for eg, how the college funtions, how the government operates, how the examiners check your papers.. how your team members work on the collective project, how it's so cold in Delhi today.. etc etc
Ofcourse, you can expand your circle of influence.. Only "Effective People" who have large circles of influence can change anything around them.. and donot have to complain about anything.
PS - Ideas derived from "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People"
Its a very great thought,but you've over simplified it.If you were to live all alone,with no one around you,no one to answer to and no one you love,then its perfect what you've written,but as soon as we are born,its a pact we make to be influenced by people around us,its not a concious decision,we never make it,its an unwritten thing.
ReplyDeleteyou can never blame others for what you've done,is true,but to say your decision has always been yours isnt.and I think sometimes people beat theselves up when infact all that has happened is that 'circumstances' havent been helping,so again,you decision has nothing to do with it.
Man makes circumstances, circumstances don't make a man.
ReplyDeleteVery 'Fountainhead'-ish if I may say. Anyway,
ReplyDeleteQ. If one of your earlier decisions did not result in the consequence you were hoping for, then the following decisions are obviously affected accordingly, are they not?
What i am talking here is how decisions influence our lives. If a decision like i will do engineering from iit for instance doesnt bear the consequent result, i take another decision which obviously decides the way ahead. Its almost like a series of pebble steps that you jump to when you're crossing a river by yourself. Every stone that you step on to is equally important and it isnt necessary that all pebbles lay their stable,hence the result or outcome is obviously not in your hands but that doesnt stop you from taking decision to cross the river or come back mid way. Does it? the decision is and will always remain yours.
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